BB has got her first reader email!

From Nicole, who wants me to publish her story: XXX and OOO!

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Have you ever, been betrayed by someone you loved so much? Someone you adored, who called and hung out with you everyday, whom you go everywhere with, who spent a lot of time actually listening to your love stories of despair because a man you care about just acts like he doesn’t know your feelings.

Well I did, and I know how deep it cuts. Yesterday the truth hit me like a bomb and I just realized that I didn’t even know who she is, anymore. That I could never trust her again. Could not ever.

I found Tara, my own so-called best friend, in bed with Tony. And she knows how I feel about him. Since months. Almost a year now. She exactly knows how I feel about Tony.

The most idiotic part about this was, that I actually bumped on their love affair by a coincidence. I wanted to drop a pair of shoes Tara wanted to borrow from me for a nightout, and it happened that I showed up about half an hour before the appointment, because I had to drive my sister to her friends’ just after. And I didn’t knock on the door. God knows that I never do – maybe I should get myself used to this new habit? Or should I not, because, had I knocked on Tara’s door, never would I have learnt about all the betrayals. I had her apartment’s spare key anyway, so whose fault that was? You should be more careful when you’re backstabbing someone, you know. Especially your best friend.

Tara didn’t even have a word to say when I entered the love scene. She was just too suprised I think, surprised that her game was over. I left as quickly as if I had entered a viral disease quarantine by accident and there had been no better thing to do than leaving as soon as possible – only the virus didn’t attack my heart, it actually stabbed my heart and broke it into painful pieces.

She tried to call me about a 100 times yesterday, and tried to drop by this morning, even a guy from the city’s flower shop called to ask if someone was home to sign a receipt for some stupid flowers from someone who left a message how sorry she was and that she never meant to and that friendship should get through obstacles and some other dumb stuff so long she must’ve paid a lot more to get them written (I asked him to tell me what the message said), but everything she does is just useless now. I can’t be bought by anything. It’s too late now.

I guess love is the worst thing in the world, because were there no love, I wouldn’t feel this way. Yes you can say I’m a drama queen, but the thing is, it really hurts me in all the horrible ways.

I :

1. am (was) Tara’s best friend, or at least I thought so.

2. have known her since the first day at junior high school, which would make it like 13 years.

3. lived with her 4 long and unforgettable college years in Brooklyn before we finished our studies and I got a job in Manhattan and had to quit the flat.

4. have been sharing her my affection for Tony ever since I got to know him.

5. introduced her to Tony so that I could have her opinions (which counted a lot for me) on him – now I’m screaming against the wall, God, why the hell did I???

She :

1. betrayed me.

2. betrayed me.

3. betrayed me.

4. betrayed me.

5. betrayed me.

The list could go on forever, but I’m not wasting my time to write it down!

To hell with Tony, I can’t even care less now. But Tara is – or was – my best friend and she should’ve been the one who understood that this would be the lowest thing one could do to his/her best friends for years. My disappointment’s come to a point where it even beats my anger towards her.

So, have you ever had any Tara’s in your life?

-Nicole, Pratt, NYC-